Entitled wealthy sister demands Christmas gifts for her 16-year-old and 14-year-old children but won't buy them for her 6-year-old and 4-year-old niece and nephew because she's "saving up" for a vacation: 'I expect her to get my kids something'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Mar 29, 2025 9:00 PM EDT

Reciprocation is the key to any relationship, showing that you're capable of paying attention to someone's basic wants and needs and have considered their best interests is really the barest of requirements for establishing a bond.

Gift-giving is a time when entitlement, selfishness, and narcissism rears its ugly head and it becomes all the more apparent to parties involved when someone just doesn't care about them. It really shows how much someone thinks of themself and how little they think of others when they're suddenly expected to go out of their way to do something for someone else.

Now, don't get me wrong, giving gifts to nieces and nephews is something that's completely up for debate. Most families, especially larger ones, don't do this. I had 13 cousins when I was a kid from my mother's side alone, and let me tell you there was no way each of us was getting gifts every year from every one of my mom's 6 siblings. Maybe it's easier in smaller families for aunts and uncles to give gifts every year, but in my family that was certainly not the case.

For some reason, this aunt thought that her kids should still be getting gifts from extended family even though she didn't repay that or reciprocate by giving gifts to her own nieces and nephews the mind-boggling reasoning behind it drove her sister to this online community looking for advice.

How much do gifts for small kids really cost in comparison to gifts for teenagers anyways?

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  • 01

    "She is choosing not to buy them gifts to spend the extra money on her own kids. No problem, but why should I still spend extra money on her kids then so they can get a nice vacation and extra gifts?"

    Cheezburger Image 10487201024
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    "AITA for not buying my nieces Christmas gifts?"

    My sister (40f) has two kids (16f, 14f). I (36f) have 2 kids (6f, 5m). This year, my sister asked if we can not exchange gifts because she is saving up to take her kids on an extravagant vacation this spring (Europe), and wants to put the money that she'd use on gifts towards the trip. I say sure, no problem. Fast forward to last week. She sends me a list of some of the things her daughters would like for Christmas. I respond and say thanks, but I am not getting them anything as you said you wan
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  • 03
    She tells me she thought I'd still be getting the girls gifts. So I say okay no problem, here is what my kids would like. She corrects herself and says she would not be buying me or my kids gifts as she's trying to save money for her trip as we had previously discussed, but she still thinks I should buy her daughters gifts. I was appalled. It's not like she can't afford to buy my kids gifts. If that were the case, I'd absolutely still buy her kids gifts. She is choosing not to buy them gifts to
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  • 04
    they can get a nice vacation and extra gifts? I thought about getting them a small gift card or something anyways, but decided against it as I didn't want my sister to feel bad for not getting my kids anything. Im not wealthy. I could afford to get them something anyways, but I also have plenty of bills I could use the money for. I told my sister if she wants me to get her kids gifts, | expect her to get my kids something, even something small, in return. She
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  • 05
    said no and called me an AH because "it's not her daughters' fault they are going to Europe so she doesn't have the extra money to spend on my kids this year". I caved and got them gift cards (because it's not their fault my sister is being a j ), and told my sister, but then she was mad that I spent less than usual on them. AITA? ETA: thank you everyone! You've made me feel better about whether or not I was being petty to my nieces. I've decided to give the gift cards to my kids teachers. I wil
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  • 06
    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a hole: 1. I didn't buy my nieces. Christmas gifts after a disagreement with my sister 2) they are kids and are being punished for my sisters behavior
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    Cheezburger Image 10487201280
    via A. C. For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 08
    LunaticBZ NTA, but Question did you already send the gift cards? If not I wouldn't send them. If you did send them I'd send your sister an itimized bill for the gift cards. Her entitlement level here is over 9000!
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  • 09
    ireallymissbuffy Of course NTA Why is your sister so entitled? If it's not her kids' "fault" that SHE isn't getting your kids gifts this year, why does she think YOUR kids should be punished??? That makes no sense. That's literally what she is doing- punishing your kids so SHE can save money for her trip. Of course she technically isn't under an obligation to give gifts to your kids- except for when she expects YOU to give gifts to HER kids. This is the social
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  • 10
    contract that she is supposed to follow, and she is ride and MEAN to act like social norms and expectations don't apply to her special children "Just because".
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  • 11
    NumbersGuy22 NTA - just let your sister know that the money you're saving by not paying for your nieces holiday gifts are going towards your own children's future trip to Europe.
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  • 12
    Emotional_Koala_ NTA - your sister wins the Internet prize for the most entitled relative of the day! And on this sub, that's saying something. Ignore and block if she escalates- and let your nieces know that you'll always be there for them despite their mum's nonsense.
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  • 13
    ClassicalEd NTA — the only AH here is your incredibly ride, entitled, and delusional sister. If you haven't already sent the gift cards, I'd keep them. I'm sorry you have sister! such a
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nephews family dynamics teens family drama aita AITAH kids teenagers siblings niece moms family feud parenting entitled people karma aunt family pregnant reddit thread parent raising kids Parenting Fail parents children entitled people
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